“The Halls of Highest Human Happiness”

A few months ago my mother said something that bothered me, and I’ve wondered about it ever since. She said that even though she knew my father extremely well before they married, the man he was then and the person he became were drastically different. My father went through several life altering circumstances and became a very different person over the 23 years they were married. The changes were all gloriously positive ones, and my parents truly delighted in each other more every year. Even though I had heard my father say many times, 

You don’t just marry a person’s past and present, you marry their future as well,

I must admit my immediate reaction to my mother’s words was the eloquent and profound, “Yikes!” 

Of course, I really shouldn’t have been surprised. The process of sanctification is, by its very definition, a process. 

The incredible truth is that as we behold the glory of the Lord we “are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as from the Lord, the Spirit” (2 Cor 3:18).

 It would be a sad thing indeed if we never changed! Doesn’t it only make sense that you’ll love a person more each year because the Altogether Lovely One is changing them to be like Himself?

However, this posed the question, 

How can I know someone completely if they are always changing, which ideally, they would be? How do I know if I’ll be compatible with the person they become?

My conclusion was that even though I don’t know the future of a person, the Lord does. If He’s my matchmaker, then I really don’t need to be concerned. I also thought that if you could know the driving passion and soul of a person, then you’d really have a grasp of who they were and who they’d become. My father changed, but the reason why he changed was always the same; namely, he wanted to please the Lord. If he was convinced from Scripture that there were better ways to please Him, then he’d change in a heartbeat! His driving motivation never wavered. 

These thoughts were very vague and the only times I tried expressing them I failed miserably. Then, a few days ago, I came across this quote by Peter Marshall. It is one of the best descriptions of marriage I’ve ever read. I was blown away! This was exactly what I was trying to say and why my parents’ marriage was one of the best examples of Christ and His Church I’ve ever seen! Peter Marshall called marriage “the halls of highest human happiness” and wrote the following concerning it. 

The perfect marriage must be a perfect blend of the spiritual, the physical, the social, and the intellectual. We are souls living in bodies. Therefore, when we really fall in love, it isn’t just a physical attraction. If it’s just that, it won’t last. 

Ideally, it’s also a spiritual attraction. God has opened our eyes and let us see into someone’s soul. We have fallen in love with the inner person, the person who’s going to live forever. 

That’s why God is the greatest asset to romance. He thought it up in the first place. Include Him in every part of your marriage, and He will lift it above the level of the mundane to something rare and beautiful and lasting.